Winterkill

I was sitting here thinking about the weather, like most of my neighbors in the great Midwest, and I suddenly wondered what the cost of the last month's storms and bitter temperatures has been. A few of us had discussed the near-panicked pre-storm stocking up that's occurred occasionally, but I'd be willing to bet that the snow, ice and bitter cold have seriously affected a lot of businesses across the area.

I know for a fact that restaurant and bar business has suffered (not that I haven't done my part to help the bars). Hell, the Haymarket closed early due to the ice storm a few weeks ago - that's serious weather, kids! I've seen that some livestock trading outfits shut down for a day or two because of the current cold snap, schools have closed for days at a time, the streets are unusually quiet downtown.

I'm not enough of an economist to determine how deep or wide the effects will be, but I'm sure that January will end up being a less than stellar month for a lot of smaller business throughout the Midwest. And that, of course, means that a lot of employees will be hurting. I haven't paid attention to state news enough to know if Culver has declared a Disaster situation, or whether that's warranted, but I know it's going to be a lean month for more than a few folks.

Roanoke 52101

The storm was brutal and far greater than we had feared. We are trapped, unable to gather supplies or journey to the neighboring villages. Our stocks run low and already we have begun to see a glimpse of the devastation that awaits our small colony. The children are wan; mothers are unable to stifle their cries of hunger.

So great is the snowfall that we have lost sight of our livestock, even though they are some small rods away from our homes. Those animals who manage to survive the snow will surely fall to the roving wolves whose nightly wailing prevents us our sleep.

We cannot heat our small abodes, as the firewood is buried so deeply that we cannot see it, and venturing to the woods would leave us lost and mean certain death. I fear this to be the end of our colony and its faithful citizens. We place our hope in Gold Almighty, but catch ourselves questioning how he could visit such a calamity upon His own.

We shall have naught but prayer for our Supper again tonight. May this record survive to inform those who shall come after us, and may God have mercy on our souls.

Is that an icicle in your pants?

Man, it's freaking COLD here!   Thank god my internal organs are protected by this newly acquired layer of Grinch fat, or I don't know what I'd do.  It's another good day to stay inside but I have some errands to run, which means I get to try out my new boots! Um, yeah, I know - wearing a new pair of boots isn't particulary exciting in the big picture, but... new boots!  (Little secret:  I'm wearing them right now.  Inside!  As I type!  Cuz they're new.)  And really, who doesn't get a secret thrill when someone says, "Hey, are those new boots you're wearing?"?  I know I do.

It's snowing again.  (Albino brain chiggers!  Cover your ears!)  It's like God is saying, "Scott.  Dude.  Get your damned skis!"  Makes me wonder if I should get those skis I've been thinking about.  And I know the ladies in town are anxiously waiting to see me in my skinny spandex ski pants.  I hear you, ladies... I hear you.

I suppose I should get going.  

Must come down

In a continuing attempt to mess with my head, the weather has taken a turn and it's -21F with the windchill, today. To put that into practical terms, it's too damned cold to go outside and do anything.

This will not stand.

The Big Thaw

I'm very confused. The temperature is over 30 degrees today, which seems unmonthably mild. (unmonthably? That's a word. I just made it up, but it's a word.) There's hardly any sign of the big storm that hit us a few days ago - not that I'm complaining.

This is the time of year when people start saying things like, "We need a good cold snap to get rid of all those cold germs!", and other people nod their heads in the shared profundity of it all. Oh, I suppose there's probably some truth to it, but it always makes me chuckle.

I still haven't picked up my X country skis but there's plenty of time for that. Well, judging by my recently developed Kidney Protection Layer, maybe I need to get on the ball. On the other hand, I seem to have grown into my new jeans, so maybe I'm better off not messing with the ol' waistline. Seriously, jeans are a lot cheaper than skis, so... No, who am I kidding - I need the exercise.

Speaking of puppies (hm? what?) my friend is going to have an adorable litter of labradoodle / retrievadoodle puppies in the next couple months. Any takers? They're going to be awwwfully cute! I should also take this time to remind you that it's a good idea to spay or neuter your pets - especially if you have a male and female dog in the same household. Ahem...

Oh! The online charity I'm working with is doing really well (no thanks to PayPal, yeesh!). I posted something this morning and we received over $800 in donations in just a couple hours. That means we can do some real good for some folks who are having a tough time. And there are plenty of them, frankly. With children. Frankly, it would be depressing if we weren't working to help make a better holiday season for them. I think I may have found my calling, to be honest. I just need to find a way to make a living at it and I'd be good.

Anyhoo - that's about it for now. Hope you're all having a great weekend, so far.

Storm's a comin', best get the chickens inside

I went over to Fareway today and it was madness. Not a shopping cart to be found, great empty spaces on the shelves - the soup section was decimated. So, when I got to the register, I asked "Is there a storm coming or it always like this on Mondays?" She laughed and, apparently, there is a storm coming.

Growing up here, I don't remember panicking or stocking up on groceries before a storm, but maybe I just didn't notice it. Then again, we always had fairly good stockpiles of food, so there wasn't a need for a rushed trip to the store. I'm sure I would have found it very exciting, though. MNMom is going through the very same thing, as I write this.

The storm, so far, is a crappy bout of ice pellets, so people are smart to stay off the streets tonight. I don't know if the stores are open late for Xmas, yet, but this weather isn't going to help. As my Dad used to say, "t'aint fit for man nor beast out there!"

The title of the post is something my friend, Scott, said once and it's always cracked me up. You have to say it in a kind of creaky, old New England voice to get the full effect, though. Go ahead and try it.